フルサトをつくる: 帰れば食うに困らない場所を持つ暮らし方 (ちくま文庫)

 「ナリワイをつくる」もとても面白かったけど、「フルサトをつくる」は、その実践編、という感じでとても面白い。

どういうものが本書で唱えられている「フルサト」かは読んでいただければわかると思うので、ここでは、共感した点、もう少し掘り下げて欲しい点をいくつかご紹介したいと思います。

「頼みごと」をする。

これって苦手な人が意外と多いんではないでしょうか？しかし、本書を読んで、頼みごとをできるということは、社会的にみて非常に立派なことなのだと思いました。なぜなら、頼みごとをするということは、仕事を作る、ということだからです。そして、それは人との関係性を生み出します。そして、それは相手のスキルをあげることに繋がります。つまり、頼みごとをできた、ということは社会的な活動を行うことができた、ということなのだと思います。逆に、頼みごとをできていない、ということは周りと関係性を構築できていない可能性があります。こういった身近なところに気を配るということは非常に重要だと思いました。

充実した生活とは

充実した生活とは衣食住の質的転換。これに多拠点居住は大きな意味を占める。理解できているとはおもうのですが、十分では内容に感じています。

編集能力が活きる

編集とは物事を発掘して組み合わせること。おそらく編集の仕事をやったことのあるひとにはとてもわかりやすいのだと思うのですが、やったことのない身としては、想像するにとどまり、もう少し編集の仕事そのものを知りたいとおもいます。

ナリワイをつくる: 人生を盗まれない働き方 (ちくま文庫)

フルサトをつくる: 帰れば食うに困らない場所を持つ暮らし方 (ちくま文庫)

Ask someone something

Do you prefer to ask something to somebody around you?  There seems to be more people who don't like it than expected.  This book reminds you of the importance of being able to ask somebody something.  It is imprtant from social a social aspect.  This is because this act means creating works.  Creating works produces relationships with people.  This leads to improving their skills.  Therefore being able to ask something to someone means being able to living in society.  Conversely, if you are not able to ask anything to anyone, it follows that you are not able to develop a good relationship with others.  That's why I felt it was very important to pay attention to everything close to you like this.

 Fulfilled life

If you want to fulfill your life, you could change the quality of life.  For this change, living in mutiple places makes a big difference.

Editing Abillity

Editing is to explore something and combine them to develop something valuable.

CAPTIVATE 最強の人間関係術 3

本日は共通の糸を探る質問について。

先日の会話の着火剤、そして、下表にある最初の質問をきっかけとして、さらに関係を深めていくために、共通の糸を探る質問を使ってみる。

 

Today's topic is to ask a question that explore what you and me have in common.

To further deepen the relationship you  developed using starters for conversation and first questions, you could try using a question that explore commonalities.

 

Fist, you clarify what commonality you are trying to find out.

Acquaintance ? Situation? Hobby?

Aquaintance is to find third person both of you know of.  From here I could ask further how you get to know the acqaintance, how you like him, how often you contact him etc.

 

Common situation can make you both feel like you are on the same boat.  It is a sense of alliance.  And from here, I could explore what has brought you in this situation.  This can deepen your personality and what kind of things you prefer.

 

Common hobby is easy. If I could find out something both of you like, conversation will spontaneously go on.  Doing this, I could find your preference.

 

 

 

 

 

Category: mutual acqaintance

First question ➡︎ exploring question

1. How did you meet the sponsor?? ➡︎　Are you familiar to Mr. XX , who works in YY.

2. I have  heard you are a friend with Mr.XX.  ➡︎  XX was a student in the YY university and have you heard of Mr. ZZ?

3. I saw you talking with Mr.XX.  How long have both of you known each other?

➡︎  Were you a room mate with XX?  Are you a colleague of XX? 

 

Category: common situation

 

 

 

CAPTIVATE 最強の人間関係術

CAPTIVATE 最強の人間関係術 2

このような言い方ができるといいですね。

regular conversation  ➡︎　good starter for conversation

Is your work going well?  ➡︎  Have you had an interesting project recently?

How are you doing?  ➡︎  Have you had anything good today?

What is your occupation?　➡︎  Do you have any work you have been doing hard personally?

How are your family?  ➡︎  What are you doing in holidays?

Where are you from?  ➡︎　Could you tell me about yourself?

How is it after that?   ➡︎  What is your plan in weekeds?

Are you busy?  ➡︎  What do you do to change your mind?

CAPTIVATE 最強の人間関係術

古賀史健がまとめた糸井重里のこと。 (ほぼ日文庫)

読みました。

糸井さんはいろんな人の影響を受けて成り立っているのだと思いました。

その人生に出てくる方からたくさんの影響を受けて、しなやかに生きているなぁと。

そして、大事に心にとどめておきたいこととして、

・一人の時間を大切にする

・考えたふりをしない

・吉本さんの言葉、岩田さんの人格

です。 

古賀史健がまとめた糸井重里のこと。 (ほぼ日文庫)

 I realized Itoi is composed of a wide range of influence from a variety of people.

Embrace when you are alone.

I don't trust a person who don't have time when you think of something by his own.

Don't pretend to think.

When you do something good, maybe you should think you are doing something bad.

That's a good balance for human.

Mr. Iwai doesn't pretend to be a great person, thinks about something constructive and takes initiative to something other people don't want to do.

If you have three persons who you think is important for you and they turst you, 

you don't need anything more.

There might be a special meaning in obtaining ISO.

But, through this process, knowing such rules makes you feel like you have to  sit up straight.  This can change the atmosphere of the company.

続・僕たちが何者でもなかった頃の話をしよう (文春新書)

This book is composed of speeches and dialogues between the speakers and the moderator.

Of them, the most impressive speaker was Oriza Hirata.

He is a theater director. 

His words easily got into my mind and was convincing.

How interesting communication is?

You will be surprised at how you think when you run into different cultures and differnt values and how your languages are recieved by them.

This is the interesting point of communication.

What is a good communication with children?

You should accept the context where your children are.

Moreover, you should send a signal that you accep the context.

Don't waste your life without intention, rather waste it beautifully.

I thought this made you start thinking how you can do in order to do it "beautifully".

This may lead you to productive way.

You should take an ability to change a job, not get a job.

By doing so, you can create your place in a fllexible manner in a company.

From sympathy to empathy. 

続・僕たちが何者でもなかった頃の話をしよう (文春新書)

おとなになるってどんなこと？

What is being adult to you?

This question seems to be easy, but is difficult.

So, are you adult ?

Why do you think so?

What do you think is the meaning of being adult?

This book is trying to answer these question.

Perhaps, this book is fof children and young adults, but meanigful to everyone regardless of age.

There are several points I want to remind you.

It is important to return to real yourself by getting back your sense in childhood once you become adult.

 This is because the sense in childhood is a compass to lead your life.   For example, you could remember something that was painful to and desolated you.  You could think about why does is desolate you.  By doing so, you would be able to see yourself from an objective aspect.

What is important at this momment is to recognize the fact and try not to neglect the fact.

What have you come to the world for?

 This is for knowing yourself completely.

Doing this, you could be of help for other people.

This is the design of society.

Live 100%

You should sharpen your sense inside while being relaxed.

Otherwise, it engangers you.

Think about what surrounds you.

 Start from your close surroundings.  And what have you been born for? What do you live for?  Thinking about this leads your future to becoming obvious.

If you are too specific to oneh thing, you will not be able to flexible to other things and will not be able to see things from different points of view.

What is self independence? 

What judges you whether you are indepenent or not is whether you have solved problems without consulting your parents, borthers and sisters.

おとなになるってどんなこと？ (ちくまプリマ―新書)

サラリーマンは300万円で小さな会社を買いなさい

読みました。

考え方として、非常に面白いと思いました。

また、このような考え方を基本的素養として持っていることがこれから非常に大事になってくると感じます。

しかし、自分にとっては少し理解に落とし込むための経験がなく、自分が残念な人間であることを認識するとともに、危機感をおぼえました。

サラリーマンは300万円で小さな会社を買いなさい 人生100年時代の個人M&A入門 (講談社+α新書)

The way of thinking shown in this book is very interesting.

Also, it is important and will be more important to have such a way of thinking as a basic knowledge.

However, for me. this book was too difficult to understand comprehensively what the book is trying to say.  This made me realize that I am a person who does not have relevant knowledge and remind me of the sense of behind the game.

逆転交渉術 ２

 第２弾です。

今回は「ノー」の理由と自由回答式質問についてまとめて整理しておきたいと思います。

「ノー」の理由　(Reason for "No")

When someone resopond to your opinion by "No", there are several reason.

• • he is not ready to agree
  • he is not comfortable with your opinion
  • he does not understand what you are trying to say
  • he is looking for another thing
  • he needs more information
  • he wants to consult with other persons

Then, let's see how we can start with this "No".

狙いを定めた自由回答式の質問（Open ended question to the point）

This is a killer method to start from "No".

Let's see examples of open questions.

You dont use "Why" and Yes-No question. You do use "What" and "How".

This leads him to using his brain to answer thequestion, resulting in guding him to where you want.

Is this similar to what you expect?

->How does it seems like?

->What do you think if it is (not) useful?

Why did you do it?

-> What make you do it?

And

• • What can help to make it baetter?
  • How do you want to proceed this?
  • What has brought about this situation?
  • How can we solve this problem?
  • What do you want to achieve?
  • How can we do it?
  • How valuable is it?
  • What is the core of this problem?
  • What is the most difficult problem you are facing?

These questions are not a strategy but a tool for you to make them think towards where you are want to direct.

You could structure the open ended questions by backcasting from where you want to reach.

逆転交渉術――まずは「ノー」を引き出せ

captivate 最強の人間関係術

This book is a comprehnsive summary of development of human connection.

What is beneficial is that a lot of practical tips are introduced here.

For example, what i was impressed by is how to make a mini stroy.

A lot of books, especially langage educatinal books sote the importance of mini stories.  They attract people and remind them of yourself.  But no matter how important I know a mini strory is, I have not understood how to make it.  I have almost gave up.

However, this book analyses how a mini story is structured and made it clear how to make it.  A mini story is consist of 4 parts: hook, conflict, unique language and boomerang.

hook: provokative question, itimulating langage and vague opinion that arouse people's curiosity.

conflict & difficulty: issues and problems to be solved, something challenging you have to overcome. This is a small tool that creates tense.

unique: stimulating words that has reality and  expressed something vivid.

hook: I saw a very wonderful scene while drving.

          I ran into a really handsome person a couple of month ago.

conflict: suddenly I saw ~

              you may think I am ~, but acutually I am ~

unique: that was reallly ~, I can not forget it.

(to be continued)

CAPTIVATE 最強の人間関係術

逆転交渉術

This book is born from practical situation, not theory.

The author has been working in the FBI, which means he has been working in a dead-or -alive situation.

This is the reason why the method he enlightens us works in a severe situation.

Acutally, I have not finished reading this book yet. However, it has a lot of tips that inspires me to try using.  That is why I'm writing here what I tried using one of the methods mentioned in the book and talk about the results of the try.

The first tip is to repeat the words the other person was saying.  This tips helps me to get information if you don't have enough to decide something.

The situation I faced today is in a barber shop.  I decided the hairstyle and sat on the chair saying '2 block'.  The barber said to me, "OK, but how much should I cut?". And then, I answered "I wonder how much should be cut." The barber said "how about 1 or 2 cm? It is the length that has extended since your last cut." I answered "Please do it, but I care about a little bit about the balance when it extends."  She responded "If so, I recommend more cut on side, and you'll have better balance".

By this conversation, I was able to get information about hair style that fits me better.

I may not say that I managed to use the method properly, but it was fun when I am aware how I am going to respond in any conversation.

逆転交渉術――まずは「ノー」を引き出せ